15 May 2009

Why Chuck Norris?

Some of you may have been wondering why I've been posting so many reviews of Chuck Norris movies recently, (and more to come) so I ought to set the record straight. I was trying to come up with the best Chuck Norris movies I could find for the Kung Fu Grindhouse annual December Chucksmas event and I thought it would be amusing, or perhaps painful to try and watch every single Chuck Norris movie ever made. So I did.
There were two exceptions; I did not watch any of the Walker Texas Ranger TV movies, and I did not watch 2 movies that I couldn't find, one being The Student Teachers in which he only has a tiny role, and some other one with Wire in the name.
I wrote a review of every single one for Genrebusters.com, but since they are defunct and most of these reviews were fairly amusing, I'm reposting them here with additional info if I can find any. I wrote an intro to the series, and a concluding statement when it was all over, but the latter is nowhere to be found at the moment. Above is the banner I did for Genrebusters, though they never used it, and below is the intro statement;

"Join me in a quest to discover what truly is the meaning of life, or perhaps the meaning of the life of Chuck Norris, and also to try and find a palatable Chuck movie to subject the drinking public to at Kung Fu Grindhouse. I am willingly subjecting myself to a long series of Clockwork Orangesque video brainwashings. Having begun the experiment, I cannot deviate from the path. I will admit that in many ways I am a glutton for punishment. Nobody understands me and I am alone in the world. I suffer for it, I am the champion of the people. (Much as Chuck erroneously believes himself to be) I am a martyr, but don’t get me wrong I’m not a Norris fan, nor do I expect this to be anything but trying, but I’ve justified it by convincing myself that I’ll be a better stronger person for doing it. Yes please, and thank you.
As I watch, I experience, feel, touch and taste that which is Chuck and bring to the printed word as much as I can of the experience. In this case I think the Stream of Consciousness is a direct tributary of Shit Creek."

During the experience I was also inspired to do two paintings for a couple of art shows I contributed to.

So anyway, that's why all the Norris, and if you're in Seattle next December come to Chucksmas, it's fun.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Whoa...these are awesome, Seth!